It takes a village to raise a village idiot

This morning I finally got around to sitting down with The Times after a brief hiatus, but 15 minutes or so into it I was so overwhelmed by the urge to ralph in my hat that I had to put the paper down. I honestly don’t know what’s going on in this country, but I’ll tell you this: we are a bunch of thumb-twiddling morons for letting this weasel of a president walk all over every single thing we hold dear. And you know what? We deserve it. Here’s why:

If you are stupid enough to listen to a president endlessly whine about the importance of sacrificing civil liberties in the name of Homeland Security, then sit idly by while your homeland becomes awash in insecurity, you deserve bush.

If you are a woman who can not see that the glimmer in that Robert weasel’s eye comes from knowing that rusty coat hangers will be jammed into your privates, you deserve bush.

If you are a working man to dim to see that governmental coddling has corporations yanking out your pension, health insurance and Social Security and stuffing you and your putrid family values down the gaping, coal mining rectum of 19th century poverty, you deserve bush.

Don’t get me wrong though. If you’re a billionaire, I’m talkin’ $1 Billion, then you belong behind bush, ‘cause he’s all about you. But be positive you’re in that class first, ‘cause takin’ 999 Million to that party is like showin’ up for church wearin’ nothing but your incontinent grandpappy’s underwear.

But even all that is not the biggest part of the problem. What w has really managed to do is convince ordinary people that they’re also on the receiving end of the corporate bazooka that’s blasting cash up the wazoos of everyone in Greenwich and Dallas. Give a middle manager 20 or 30 grand in artificially inflated holdings and all of a sudden he thinks he’s hobnobbing. That combines so delectably with the truly nefarious part of w’s scheme: that he and his buddies really don’t give a damn about capitalism, the market or even democracy. To them those notions are just a means to an end, their way of preserving their British Landed Aristocratic Plebe Squelching in a “Democratic” society. They think they’re superior, and in order to preserve their heritage they’ve got to convince us to install them into power. And we simply can not lunge at the chance to scatter our life savings over the cobblestones of American labor to soften the footfall of their jackboot fast enough. Doesn’t all this make sense? Where do you think w would be right now if he hadn’t been born into one of the most powerful families in North America? I’m guessing something along the lines of third shift driver at Jed’s A to Z All Night Chicken BarBQ and Towing.

But hey, what do I know. I’m just a bloggin’ rabble-rouser with a two bit education and 80 proof breath. Maybe you put bush there yourself and you’re happy to see him stay. And even if I’m right, what do you have to loose? Just your home, uterus and livelihood, that’s all.